Saturday, February 14, 2009

hall of shame

so, i'm reading through the bible with my church and i've come to some startling realizations.... (and these are old testament realizations)

so far, everyone in the bible were losers, in some way, shape, or form. by loser, i mean, screw up, not on the up and up. sketchy. questionable. of ill repute. here's just a few:

adam - enough said

eve - wife of the year

cain - serious need for some anger management classes

abel - apparently not that bad, but probably should've beefed up on his self-defense skills

[side note: it's pretty bad if, right off the bat - literally - you're still kind of in the prequel of the overall biblical story, and God says, and i quote, "I will blot out man whom I have created from the face of the land, man and animals and creeping things and birds of the heavens, for I am sorry that I have made them." - personally, i feel bad for the animals and birds... i'm sure they had a bone to pick. "what the heck did we do??"]

on with the list:

noah - now, he seemed to be a winner, including being the first non-vegetarian. i wonder what that first burger was like?

nimrod - he was actually a mighty hunter and considered a mighty man... most likely because he had to combat that he was indeed named "nimrod"

tower of babel peeps - is it possible that humans are so smart that it makes us stupid? you know, your greatest strength becomes your greatest weakness...

needless to say, i could go on (we're currently finishing up exodus right now and just like there are certain people who are constantly great material for comedians... the israelites can tend to be great material for "how to screw up yet again"

feel free to add your nominees to the hall of shame... there's plenty to go around.

moral of this blog: if you think that reading through the bible is going to make you feel worse about yourself... think again.

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